Other person: So, what do you want to be when you grow up?
Me: A writer.
Them: Hahahaha, that's hilarious.
Them: It's a good joke, what you just said. *wipes tear of mirth* Aha. Writer. Ha, yeah.
Me: But... I do want to be a writer.
Them: Don't be silly, you want to be a lawyer.
Me: No, I don't.
Them: Yes, you do. Everyone wants to be a lawyer.
Me: Clearly not, since I don't.
Them: But how do you know if you haven't tried being a lawyer?
Me: I think most lawyers became lawyers because they were interested in it. I am not interested. I'm not going to sink tons of money and years of my life into doing something I don't want to do.
Them: You'll want to when you get older. You just aren't mature enough to understand yet.
Me: Uh, yeah, I think I'm old enough to know by now.
Them: Well, maybe you just haven't found the right law school yet.
Me: No, you don't understand, I'm not interested in law school at all, it's not a matter of finding the right-
Them: You never know. A woman's hormones change over her lifetime.
Me: What does that have to do with anything?
Them: You never know.
Me: Stop saying that! I don't want to be a lawyer, I want to write.
Them: That's so unnatural. Law is a basic human need. I feel so sorry for you. Writers have terrible pay, you know. Being a lawyer is so much better. You'll change you're mind. You'll be broke and miserable if you don't, you poor, pitiful being.
Them: So, do you masturbate?